


Episode 12 - Parting Sorrows

by stgjr



Series: "The Power of a Name" Series 2 - "Time Lord Triumphant" [8]
Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005), Multi-Fandom, Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Crossover, Gen, Multiple Crossovers, Multiverse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-25
Updated: 2017-03-28
Packaged: 2018-10-10 12:04:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 16,210
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10437372
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stgjr/pseuds/stgjr
Summary: Damage to the TARDIS leads our narrator and his Companions into a fateful encounter with the crew of the lost Federation Starship Voyager... and the cybernetic menace of the Borg!





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally posted on May 26th, 2014.

As much as I regret it, the time has come for me to tell you one of the most painful stories I have.  
  
This is the story of how I lost Janias and Camilla.  
  
It began auspiciously enough. I needed one last piece of technology for my special project, and after mulling borrowing it from the Federation, I decided it would be easier to examine a similar device from another source, one who's cosmos I had recently become acquainted with.  
  
The facility was well-lit for its owners, and we materialized in stealth mode to not set off any alarms. I stepped out and looked over the blue-surfaced computer control surfaces and equipment, waving my sonic around on a record mode linked to the TARDIS. "Quantum compilation technology, very nice. Not sure why they mixed it with digital card data storage though. You'd think a quantum state system would..."  
  
"Doctor...." Janias gave me a look that told me "Stop with the technobabble and hurry up".  
  
"Oh yes, right, right...." I went over to the colorful projector hanging down from the top of the room, recently assembled, and gave it a good scan too. "Quantum compiler, data integrator... very nice. I'll have to make modifications of..."  
  
"Who are _you_?!"  
  
The demanding female voice made me turn my head toward the opening to the chamber. A young lady stood there, flanked by humanoid minions with large two-handed blades that reminded me of _bat'leth_ s, her hair colored a deep read and a cybernetic attachment of some sort on the right side of her face. Ah, _her_. I had been hoping to get out before they knew I was here....  
  
"Me? I'm the Doctor. Just a passer-by, looking at some very interesting technology." I pocketed my sonic. "You would be Astronema, yes? Pleasure to make your acquaintance, we'll be going now."  
  
"Take them!"  
  
Janias' lightsaber flashed to life, slicing at the first minion to come at her and cutting its blade in two. I pulled out the sonic disruptor and fired a wide-arc burst that knocked everyone down. "Let's go!" I snapped my fingers, opening the TARDIS doors, and rushed into it with the girls. I ignored closing it for the moment, going straight for the controls and my prearranged escape coordinates.  
  
And as I grabbed the lever and pulled, I regretted not closing them. immediately.  
  
Astronema struggled to her feet as I yanked the lever. I snapped my fingers the moment her hand came up holding some sort of weapon. A beam of red energy lashed out, going through the closing TARDIS doors and slicing into the TARDIS engine. The VWORP VWORP VWORP turned into a shriek as sparks showered around us. I cursed my luck and went to work on the controls, trying to make sure we got back out of the Time Vortex and doing my best to avoid being thrown down by the rocking of the TARDIS The girls secured themselves quickly, aided by long practice, despite the flickering lights inside the TARDIS. I have to say, we had seen this happen far too bloody often. I needed to stop being so careless.  
  
I would, obviously, have great cause to regret that bit of carelessness.  
  
After the shaking stopped I went over to one of the screens to check on things. The damage to the engine was severe and self-repair would take several days. We were lucky that it lasted long enough to bring us back out of the Time Vortex.  
  
"Close one."  
  
"We need stealth devices," Janias complained, leaning on a rail. "Is that going to be the last technology theft we commit for a while, Doctor? Please?"  
  
"I certainly hope so," I replied. "Now I need to find out where we are." I brought up external systems to get a star or planet reading, but found nothing of either; we were in a structure of some sort, or a ship. Definitely a ship given the sensor returns I was getting.... "Damage to the systems, I can't see any more of what's out there."  
  
There was a knock on the door.  
  
I turned to Janias in the gloom of the damaged TARDIS and she nodded. She felt no immediate danger. I gave a hand to Cami, who'd gone to her knees holding on to one of the other railings, and once she was on her feet I walked past her and Janias to the TARDIS door. My hands gripped my sonic and my sonic disruptor tightly and Jan's hand went to her lightsaber, although she didn't turn it on. With my grip remaining on my sonic screwdriver, I used my right hand to open the door.  
  
There was a figure in front of me, and beyond that figure were others, including a couple of fellows pointing weapons at me. Phasers, to be precise.  
  
My eyes focused on the persons at my door, and their familiar uniforms. Branch colors on shoulders and black.  
  
I almost cringed at seeing who they were.  
  
"I'm Captain Kathryn Janeway of the Federation _Starship Voyager_." Janeway crossed her arms. "And you would be the Doctor."  
  
The thought that went through my mind was simple.  
  
 _Oh bloody hell._  
  
  
  
  
  
So the bridge of the _Voyager_. Oi. To think about winding up here of all places. And with lingering memories of the SFDebris reviews no less. I half expected to hear Janeway start talking like a mad scientist.  
  
That she knew who I was, well... I had suspicions of that, even if Dax hadn't recognized me back on DS9 early in my journeys.  
  
"A reputation precedes me," I said. "Although I'm curious as to which one."  
  
"The one where you're the most dangerous time criminal listed on Federation records," Janeway answered. "Wanted for repeated violations of the Temporal Prime Directive."  
  
"Really? I must say, I haven't done much at all in this timeline so far. Wait, is this about that business with Doctor Phlox and the cure for the Valakians? Because I have a very, very good explanation for that..."  
  
Tuvok interrupted me at that point. "Captain, might I suggest that in our current state, we cannot act on Standing Order 30."  
  
I looked at him in confusion. "Excuse me, I don't think I've heard that one."  
  
"It was implemented at the request of the Federation Science Council and the Director of Temporal Investigations," he explained. "'If ever encountered, every attempt to incarcerate or neutralize the being known as the Doctor must be made.'"  
  
My jaw dropped. "There's an entire Starfleet Standing Order on me? That's.... bloody overkill, that's what that is." It was quite stunning to realize that Starfleet felt it necessary to devote an entire Standing Order to me.  
  
Then again, I'd one day learn why they did it.  
  
"Mister Tuvok's right," Chakotay remarked stoically. "We've got bigger concerns."  
  
I noticed that the _Voyager_ running lights were set to lower power with red alert lights.  
  
And then the ship shook underneath us.  
  
"The Borg cube has locked us in a tractor beam." Harry Kim was at his chair-less station. Why haven't these people ever heard of chairs? Even Sisko has them on the _Defiant_.  
  
My thoughts at the moment were focused on the same problem that had the _Voyager_ crew's attention. " _Borg?!_ " Some terrible thoughts crossed my mind. Namely, the thought of the Borg somehow assimilating the TARDIS.  
  
Or us.  
  
I ran past Janeway and up to Kim's station. "Hey!" he protested as I knocked him aside and began operating the Okudagram interface.  
  
"What the hell are you doing to my ship?", Janeway demanded even as I had phasers pointed at me.  
  
"Saving it," I remarked. "Ah, navigational deflectors. Almost as versatile as a sonic screwdriver."  
  
I did something... enormously complex in terms of technowizardry, worthy of the most obtuse technobabble you've ever heard, and used the navigational deflector to form a specialized field around _Voyager_ that even the Borg tractor beam couldn't hold onto. The ship lurched ahead again, under Mister Paris' expert hand, and went back to warp. "That should confuse them for a while," I muttered. "I'm not sure if they can adapt quickly to that, but I've got a few other tricks if they do it quickly."  
  
I looked at sensors and saw the Borg ship was following. I let Ensign Kim make the report, though. "The Borg ship is hanging back at a distance of about one parsec."  
  
"Just far enough behind that they can see any traps we lay." I sighed. "There goes the plan for the quantum disruptor mine."  
  
"Quantum disruptor mine?", Kim asked in confusion.  
  
"I thought you'd know by now that quantum can do anything, if it's the right kind of quantum," I joked. "Subatomics and probability are so fun to play with." I stepped out from Kim's station and back toward Janeway. "Captain, I'm not sure what I've done to earn the ire I've gotten from DTI. It's probably from something further down my timestream, so finding out about it would be most annoying since I don't like the thought of being forced to do something lest I cause a paradox and big bat things start to eat everything." I offered a hand. "I'm the Doctor, a Time Lord. I'd like to help you."  
  
Janeway eyed my hand warily. I knew she could make deals with things that she disliked, but on the other hand she was a Federation zealot and could be counted on to stand up for things like the Prime Directive beyond all reason. "How do I know I can trust you? You've proven hostile to the Federation before."  
  
"I'm not sure why anyone thinks that," I protested. "I've done nothing to harm the Federation and, honestly, that whole thing with the Valakians made it stronger."  
  
Janeway narrowed her eyes. "So you say."  
  
We stared at one another for a moment. I tried not to imagine a spider on her shoulder, urging her to eat Harry. Dammit, SFDebris...  
  
I drew in a breath. "Captain, there's been a horrible misunderstanding between me and the Federation due to my squabbles with Agent Lucsly and the DTI. I'm actually a great fan of the Federation and Starfleet. Oh, sometimes you're a bit... preachy, and the Prime Directive thing's become more dogmatic than it should be, but all things considered you're all good people and I will work to protect you. The Borg? I've faced down things like the Borg. Things worse than them, in fact. All I want to do is help you save your crew from them, and if we give them a bloody nose in the process, well, that's a little extra enjoyment for me."  
  
Janeway remained quiet for a moment before giving a brief nod. "Alright. We'll work together on this. Better to have you on our side than fighting us trying to get away. Commander, have everyone report to the conference room."  
  
It was so nice to be appreciated...  
  
  
  
  
Minutes later we were in the Magic Meeting Room. The girls and I remained standing as the situation was explained to us. _Voyager_ had been gathering needed supplies from a nearby system and a Borg Cube had happened upon them. The Borg had decided to assimilate them because, well, they're the Borg, and supposedly they had nothing better to do than go after _Voyager_.  
  
"The Cube is now within two light years of our position and closing slowly," Janeway noted to her crew. "We need a way to get them off of us. Suggestions?"  
  
"There are no suitable nebulae or spatial phenomena to hide in within fifty light years," Seven reported. "There is nowhere to hide."  
  
"And we can't turn and fight, they out-gun us," Chakotay added.  
  
"Can't hide, can't run, can't fight," I murmured. "Hrm. We need to change the rules."  
  
"Change the rules?", Janeway asked.  
  
"Yes. Change the parameters of the situation. Find a way to do one of those things." I put my hands together. "Hrm, cloaking device? No, too long to cobble one together."  
  
"We could drop out of warp near a gas giant, skirt the atmosphere, and remodulate our deflectors to mask our warp field," Torres proposed.  
  
I looked at her. "You love your big words, don't you? A thought, but they're getting too close for that to work, all they need to do is see the warp transition and know what you're trying."  
  
"Maybe we can max out the warp core," Paris proposed. "Find a way to hit maximum warp long enough to outrun them."  
  
"We took damage," Torres pointed out, shaking her head. "There's no way I can give you enough time at maximum warp to get out of sensor range of the Borg."  
  
"So we're still at 'can't hide and can't run'." I finished a circuit around the table, seeing Janeway, Chakotay, and Tuvok were eyeing me closely.  
  
"Why can't we fight?", Janias asked.  
  
"Because the Borg are, in their own way, deadlier than the Reapers," I explained to her.  
  
That won me a skeptical look from the girls, so I explained. "Imagine if the Reaper husks could adapt to the weapons you used to reduce or outright nullify them," I said. "And if with just one injection, they could turn you into another husk in just a few minutes."  
  
Camilla paled a little.  
  
"Wait, just what are the Reapers?", Paris asked.  
  
"The arrogant spiritual cousins of the Borg," I remarked simply. "Very full of themselves. Well, they were anyway." I smirked. "Still.... fight is our remaining option. We need to cripple the Cube's warp drive so it can't pursue you. Eventually it will give up and go to other tasks."  
  
"An extremely difficult goal for us to attain," Tuvok pointed out.  
  
"Yes." I continued to walk around the table. "Given how fast they adapt to your phasers..." A thought came to mind and I smiled. "But I'd like to see them catch up with phasers firing on a multi-spectrum pattern."  
  
"What are you saying?"  
  
"Why, Harry, it's simple! Ask yourself, how does the Borg adaptation work?" I felt the momentum in my head pick up. "It's not magic, it operates on a physical principle. Namely, by matching the frequency of your weapon, the shield's energy peaks as the beam's does, in perfect sync. The entire shot meets maximum resistance and it becomes power versus power at the point of the shot. And, frankly, the bigger ship wins." I brought my sonic up and turned the monitor on, remotely altering the display to show what I was getting at. A diagram of a phaser shot with multiple frequencies resonating within appeared. "So you change your phasers so that the energy waves propagate at multiple frequencies. It's not like random single frequency alteration, which the Borg can guess at and change to cover more rapidly than you can deliver damage. They can only adapt to one of the frequencies."  
  
"Unless they shift to multi-spectrum shields as well," Tuvok pointed out. "Or employ secondary shields at the different frequencies."  
  
"Oh yes, but you see, every frequency added increases the complexity of the calculation to guess our pattern since there are so many frequencies they have to account for within each given pulse. Even after they adjust, their adaptation will not be perfect. Especially if the modulations are very complex."  
  
"The proposal is sound," Seven noted.  
  
"Theoretically, yes," Tuvok agreed, but with a strong "but" hovering in the air. "However, such a complex operation is beyond our current control systems."  
  
I waved my hand dismissively. "Oh please, give me and Seven an hour and we can have the modifications ready."  
  
"The issue is not just hardware but software," Tuvok countered. "Our fire control systems are not capable of calculating the complex modulations you propose."  
  
"True." I looked to Janeway. "That's where trust comes in, Captain."  
  
"Your meaning, Doctor?"  
  
"I can hook the TARDIS up to your fire control systems to be used for the necessary calculations," I explained. Seeing the look on her face I quickly added, "In a way that does not give them control of the actual firing. Fire control itself would remain with _Voyager_ , the TARDIS would simply help calculate the frequencies for your shots."  
  
"And where does trust come in?"  
  
"Because the TARDIS has only so much processing power." Camilla explained before I did. "By doing this, the Doctor is prolonging the TARDIS' self-repair. It'll take longer to get it in working order."  
  
"Yes, what my dear Companion just said."  
  
Janeway nodded. Again I could imagine Chuck's voice of Parody Janeway contemplating all of the ways to trick me. My luck that one of the memories I kept of my old life was knowing what those reviews were, they were a tad distracting.  
  
Here in what passes for the real world, Captain Janeway finally nodded. "It's a good plan. It may even chase the Borg off. Can we do the same thing with our defenses?"  
  
"The TARDIS can only handle so much," I explained. "But I believe that even in her state, I can use the TARDIS to reinforce your shields long enough to give us a few good shots.  
  
"Good. We'll buy you all of the time you need to execute your plan, Doctor. You're all dismissed."  
  
As the command crew filed out Janias and Cami came up to me. "And what do you want us to do?"  
  
"Get things set up in the TARDIS for me. We're going to want to move it to Main Engineering."  
  
"We'll get started on whatever you need Doctor," Cami assured me.  
  
"Excellent. Now if you'll excuse me." I looked over to where Seven was waiting with an air of impatient patience. "I need to get to work."  
  
"With her?" Janias smirked. "Oh poor, pitiful you, however can you stand to be close to someone like that?"  
  
I gave Janias a goodbye smirk as I walked away.  
  
  
  
  
It's not easy being six and a half fleet tall and trying to crawl around those damned Jeffries tubes. And then, when you add to the occasion a buxom blonde, it's a situation almost asking for an embarrassing moment or three.  
  
Thankfully I avoided them.  
  
I was busy in an open section, modifying the guts of one of the phaser arrays with my sonic screwdriver. Seven was further down the tube doing her own alterations according to our mutual plan. "What is your purpose, Doctor?", Seven asked, showing a quality for multi-tasking.  
  
"My purpose?"  
  
"Your goal." Seven didn't turn her head. "The claim that you are a time traveling madman is not consistent with your behavior, so you are clearly working toward another purpose."  
  
"My purpose, Seven, is to travel the Multiverse, enjoy the sights, solve some mysteries that have occupied my mind, and whenever the opportunity comes, to give certain well-deserving forces some much-needed humility," I answered. "Unless it causes a time paradox, then I simply do what I can to try and help people."  
  
"That is all?"  
  
"Yes." I looked over to her. "What about you, hrm?"  
  
"Me?"  
  
"Living on a ship where people still see you as an incarnation of their nightmare, where disgust still smolders behind their eyes whenever you look into them," I said. "It has to get to you."  
  
Seven stopped for a moment. "Sometimes," she finally admitted. "The Borg do not treat others like this."  
  
"No, they don't. Not drones." My expression curled into a mirthless, sarcastic grin. "They just mutilate you and enslave your mind, take away anything that makes you unique, an individual. You're just a cog in a massive, consuming machine. No sadness or happiness, joy or pain, just the constant thrum of the Collective in your head, controlling every thought and action."  
  
"Yes," Seven agreed, and I could see she was torn. There was a certain, perverse freedom in that, after all. Not having to think for yourself, not having to feel, or starve. I think a part of her missed that. But a greater part enjoyed being an individual, enjoyed the freedom of thought she now enjoyed. "And how do you feel about me, Doctor?"  
  
"Me? I've barely gotten to know you, can't say much on the matter. You seem well enough, maybe a bit on the arrogant side. Like I'm one to talk." I laughed harshly. "We both have that, I'd say. The arrogance of all the knowledge and intelligence we've got now. Becoming more than Human."  
  
"You were Human?", she asked.  
  
"Was. Can't remember it. Someone locked it away in my head. I barely remember even being Human." I sighed. "Given enough time I doubt I'll even remember that."  
  
"I see. So we have something in common."  
  
"You mean being stripped of our Humanity by forces beyond our control and having our minds twisted to suit their purposes?" I nodded. "Yes, I suppose so. Anyway, I'm done here."  
  
"As am I. The phasers are ready for multi-spectrum firing."  
  
"Good. We had better get down to Main Engineering."  
  
  
  
  
I had just finished opening the link from the TARDIS to the fire control systems when Janeway's voice came over the intercom. " _The Borg Cube is entering weapons range._ "  
  
"Everything's ready, Captain," Torres answered.  
  
I felt the sudden shift in the ship as it dropped from warp. Moments later, as it turned an twisted, the Cube dropped from warp as well. I watched a systems control panel light up as phaser energy lashed out. " _Borg shields ineffective against our fire_ ," Tuvok reported. " _I am aiming at known power junctions._ "  
  
Janias and Camilla remained by the TARDIS, looking very much lost with nothing to do. Even I only had monitoring duties; this time we were letting others do the heavy lifting.  
  
"The Cube is adjusting shields, they are adapting." Seven had another station, clearly ignoring the semi-disgusted snarl on Torres' face. "I am detecting other frequency structures forming within their shield pattern."  
  
"Not surprising. Let me see." I altered the fire pattern for the phasers and then, for more help, made a small modification to the navigational deflector. "Mister Kim, trigger the deflector on our next pass."  
  
There was a pause before he acknowledged, undoubtedly making sure Janeway approved. He would be reluctant, and understandably so, to provoke her into tightening the clamp on his.... dammit, I can't get that out of my head. Even as a Time Lord!  
  
It was Tuvok who confirmed my success. " _The Borg shields are destabilizing. We have achieved several direct hits on the Cube._ "  
  
"They won't fall for that again," I muttered. There were various drawbacks to trying multi-spectral shields, and I'd exploited one, namely an energy burst that destabilized the field. It would be easy to counter, unfortunately.  
  
The ship shuddered under us. "The Borg cube is locking a tractor beam."  
  
I held up my sonic and pointed it to the TARDIS. With a press of a button its systems activated and channeled energy into _Voyager_ 's shields. The shuddering lessened. "The tractor beam has dissipated."  
  
I watched my systems as Tuvok landed several more hits, including one on the tractor emitters. But sensors showed the Borg's warp systems were still unaffected. I frowned. We needed more time, how could I....  
  
The ship rocked again. "Our aft shields are out." Torres began barking orders to the other engineers to get them restored.  
  
That was when I heard the transporter beams.  
  
They appeared just six feet behind me and in front of the girls and TARDIS. Six columns overall, each coalescing into Borg drones. Torres pulled a phaser and fired, sending sparks flying from one. When another phaser struck them, it dissipated ineffectively against a shield.  
  
I brought the sonic up and used it to disrupt the nearest drone's implants. It fell to the floor in spasms. I turned to use it on another drone, sending it to the floor as well. A familiar sound filled engineering and a lightsaber blade sliced through two remaining drones. Janias pointed her arm up and send the third flying all the way into the main entrance to Engineering. Seven grabbed one, twisted it around, and allowed Torres to get another phaser shot that brought it down.  
  
Before we could celebrate, six more Borg beamed in.  
  
Right beside me.  
  
I twisted away as they all looked my way, clearly targeting me. In the heat of the moment I realized that I was the target; they'd detected my life signs, saw me as a new species, and were curious. Undoubtedly the same was true with Janias, who found six _more_ drones beaming in beside her.  
  
I'd given the sonic disruptor to Cami, and she fired it on a wide arc, hitting the drones coming after me and slamming them all against the nearest console. Setting 8C. Excellent choice. It destabilized them enough that I could bring my sonic up and scramble their implants more decisively.  
  
Janias' lightsaber was a blur, slicing through Borg drones effortlessly, while security officers poured phaser fire into another arriving group. Every so often their shots would stop working and then resume as a result of the constant tug of war between Tuvok's rather brilliant random frequency-change program and the Borg adaptation.  
  
I looked back to the system control board, seeking to resume that work and make sure my plan was working. I figured everything was under control.  
  
And I was horribly, horribly wrong.  
  
  
  
" _Doctor, look out!_ "  
  
Thanks to Cami's warning I barely turned in time to avoid getting grabbed by a drone that had gotten up beside me. I brought my sonic up just for the drone to bat it out of my hand. A burst of sonics fried its implants a moment later. I turned to face Cami, thanks and praise on my lips.  
  
She screamed as my eyes came to bear. A drone was now behind her, its right arm up.  
  
I watched in horror as twin points erupted from its hand device and buried themselves into Cami's neck. She went limp and the sonic disruptor fell from her hand.  
  
" _Cami!_ ," I screamed. I scrambled for the sonic on the ground and had to roll to avoid another drone. I scrambled to my feet and watched the drone pull her away into the gaggle of drones that kept beaming into Main Engineering. I lifted my sonic and began to trigger it over and over, taking out every drone I could. From within their ranks I could see her, her lovely face contorted into pain and terror, the gray of Borg nanoprobes beginning to blotch her skin.  
  
I used the sonic to summon the sonic disruptor toward me, grabbing it in mid-air with my left hand. I triggered Setting 12 and watched the wave of sonic energy erupt from its purple tip, slamming into the Borg in front of me with a shower of sparks from overloaded cybernetic implants.  
  
" _ **Camilla!**_ "  
  
Janias, hearing our cries, had turned and screamed her love's name. With a look of horror and anger on her face Janias leaped at the Borg in fury, her lightsaber in constant motion as if she would cut through each and every one of them. A cyclone of purple light began to scythe through the Borg ranks, aided by the repeated blasts from both of my sonic devices.  
  
It didn't matter that the rest of _Voyager_ 's crew was busy with other Borg or with their duties in the fight. With the two of us in tandem, the Borg couldn't hold us back. I knew they couldn't. We were going to blast through them and get Cami out, and then we'd get those probes out of her and get back to work on giving the Borg the bloody nose they deserved.  
  
I went to work on protecting Janias' flanks with my sonics while Janias kept slicing her way in to get Cami out. "Jan, be careful!", I shouted. "I'll keep them off of you but you've got to give me time!"  
  
She didn't answer. Every part of Janias' being was focused on saving Camilla.  
  
That was why she didn't see the blow coming until it was too late.  
  
Unfortunately, slicing a Borg drone apart at the waist didn't necessarily kill it. One such Borg drone, still active, ended up by Jan's leg.  
  
Like a snake its arm struck out. Twin points jabbed Janias in the ankle.  
  
" _Jan!_ ", I screamed.  
  
She cried out, and for a terrible moment, she was vulnerable.  
  
The drones around her attacked, grabbing her before she could try and continue to fight. Her lightsaber fell from her hand as two more sets of nanite injectors buried themselves into her right arm. Another set went into her left. I watched them jab her in the neck and one went through her shirt to inject her in the side of the ribs. She screamed and collapsed, rigid, into their grip as the Borg nanites flooded into her body.  
  
I let out a " _ **No!**_ " that echoed throughout Main Engineering. I brought the sonics up and let loose a burst that brought down over half a dozen more drones. And I didn't stop. Screaming in pure rage and terror and hatred, I kept my sonics active and blasted my way through the Borg drones to get to my stricken Companions.  
  
I wouldn't let them be taken. Not like this. Not _by_ this. No!  
  
I would save them!  
  
I _had_ to save them!  
  
I screamed again and send down another group of Borg. I was to the ones that held Jan and Cami. I'd gotten to them! I....  
  
I watched as green light snatched them away, along with the rest of the Borg.  
  
For a moment I couldn't say or do anything. I just looked at the open space, beside the warp core, where they had once been. My hearts felt like they had stopped beating. My hands went numb and my sonic screwdriver and disruptor dropped to the ground.  
  
"No," I whimpered. "No no no no no...."  
  
" _The Borg Cube is powering warp engines,_ " I heard, somewhere in the periphery of my senses. Harry Kim's voice sounded like it was coming from the end of a tunnel. I grabbed at the railing around the warp core to try and hold myself up. " _They're going to warp._ "  
  
For a moment I heard a few cheers and sounds of celebration from behind me. I almost lashed out in anger, but I couldn't find the breath. I just stared at the empty space where my Companions had been.  
  
I'd lost them.  
  
I'd lost Jan and Cami.  
  
I'd lost them to the _Borg_.  
  
"No!" I forced myself to run and saw Seven and Torres staring at me. "They've taken them! They've taken my friends! We've got to catch them!"  
  
"It's not possible," Torres said. "We've taken damage to our drive..."  
  
" _Then fix the bloody thing!_ ", I screamed. "I've got to get them back! I've got..."  
  
I'd like to say that I coiled all of that emotion up into a spring and held it in place, to unleash on the Borg when I was ready. That I gathered my emotions, buried them, focused entirely on fixing the TARDIS or _Voyager_ or both and putting together a plan to rescue my friends and treat the Borg Collective to the full wrath of a Time Lord.  
  
But all I could see was the terror on my Companions' faces as the Borg stole their bodies from within and took them away.  
  
My legs came out from under me as guilt and grief piled on my shoulders until I couldn't stand anymore.  
  
My Companions had trusted me. They'd trusted me with their lives, their hopes, their dreams, they trusted that I'd protect them as we explored the wonders of the Multiverse.  
  
They'd trusted me and I'd failed them.  
  
 _I'd failed them._  
  
All i could do, at that time, was scream wordlessly in a desperate, and fruitless, attempt to unload the despair and rage and guilt building up within me.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our narrator devotes everything he has to saving Janias and Camilla from the Borg.

It took some time, but a part of my mind began to enforce control over the emotions roiling within me. It reminded me that they needed me. That I had to rescue the girls from the Borg. I was doing them no good screaming incoherently.  
  
Tuvok and a security team had arrived in Engineering. "My condolences, Doctor," the dour Vulcan remarked. "The error was mine for my choice of tactics."  
  
"You did what you could," I murmured. "I need my TARDIS moved somewhere quiet. A cargo bay or some such."  
  
"I will arrange a team to do so immediately. May I ask what your plans are?"  
  
I looked into Tuvok's eyes at that, feeling sarcastic, and noticing that he was already certain of my answer. "I'm getting my Companions back from them, Mister Tuvok."  
  
"I am curious as to how you expect to accomplish this task. There are thousands of drones on a Cube and our sensors cannot isolate them even if we were in range."  
  
"More than one way to deal with that, Mister Tuvok. But for the moment,, I've got work to do." I opened the TARDIS and stepped inside. "And I don't want any interruptions."  
  
  
  
  
I didn't notice how many hours passed after I returned to the TARDIS and began frantic repairs. As it was I didn't ask Janeway about pursuing the Cube; we hadn't damaged it enough for the _Voyager_ to ever catch up.  
  
No, I'd do it myself. No matter what it took. I _had_ to rescue them.  
  
The TARDIS' systems were in bad shape from the damage Astronema had caused and there was further slight damage from feedback caused by hooking it up to this cursed ship. But I wouldn't let that daunt me. I had to save Jan and Cami.  
  
Someone less attached than I would worry about what the Borg might learn from their minds concerning the Multiverse, and how it might drive them. After the fact it would be an easy reason for me to cite for taking the risks I was about to undergo.  
  
I didn't actually care at the time, though. All I could see was their expressions as the Borg nanites worked within them, altering their bodies and forcing their minds to succumb to the Collective Hive Mind.  
  
And then my imagination took over, forcing me to watch as the Borg mutilated their bodies and turned them into drones. Just two more worker drones in an ant-hill, their minds crushed under the weight of the Collective and enslaved to its will.  
  
That made me work even harder. Even faster. Even as my body insisted on needing food and rest, I could not. Not while my Companions were under their control.  
  
I was so intent on my work that I ignored the knock on the TARDIS door for over a minute. Finally I shouted, "Go away!"  
  
When the door opened anyway, I had a good idea of who it was.  
  
"Hello? Are you in here Doctor?"  
  
 _Him_.  
  
"I've made some fine vegetable stew for you! You should really eat... up... _wow_."  
  
I looked up from the half-opened central console. Neelix was gawking at the inside, holding a tray with a covered soup bowl on it. "It's bigger on the inside."  
  
"Very astute of you," I mumbled. "Why are you here?"  
  
"As Chief Morale Officer and ship's cook it is my duty to..."  
  
"Stop." I held up a hand. "Not another word. Not interested."  
  
"You really should eat. If you don't like the stew, I know a marvelous recipe for..."  
  
I slammed my left hand down on the controls. "I know you're trying to be nice, so I'll keep this kind," I snarled. "I am not interested, Neelix, in anything but getting this work done. If you want to bring me food, fine. Set it down and I'll eat it when I feel I need to. But do not stand there and blather to me about whatever flits about in your head. I haven't got the time!"  
  
I looked away from him and back to my work. After a minute or so I heard him speak again. "There's an old Talaxian expression that I think you need to..."  
  
"I don't have time for trite little folk sayings, you self-important little hedgehog! _Bugger off!_ ", I roared.  
  
Neelix looked a bit offended at that. But he finally got the hint and scampered out.  
  
I allowed myself one spoonful of stew and returned to my work. It seemed like only seconds later that I heard the TARDIS door open again. "I thought I told you to...!" I turned and found it was Seven instead. "Ah, Seven. My apologies."  
  
"I see Mister Neelix was by already."  
  
"Yes. Brought me that stew. Took a bite, tastes fine. Surprisingly."  
  
"But you have not finished it."  
  
"No. Too busy. The TARDIS is almost fixed and then I can go after the Borg to get my Companions back."  
  
"I would advise against that in..."  
  
"Don't you dare," I hissed, looking up and glaring at Seven. "Don't you bloody dare! I'm not going to make them suffer a moment longer. I'm going to..."  
  
Seven moved too fast. Or maybe I was too slow from lack of sleep and food. Her hand came from around her back and shot up to my neck before I could get my arm in the way to stop her. I felt the cold sensation of a hypospray against my neck and felt it discharge, sifting its contents into me directly through my skin. Whatever she'd injected me with quickly reached my brain. Everything became hazy and I stumbled forward. "What have you....?"  
  
I felt her catch me as I fell over. My eyes shut and everything went black.  
  
  
  
  
There was a great weight on my mind. I opened my eyes and looked out on a terrifying vista; the passages of a Borg vessel. It somehow seemed right.  
  
 _Perfection. Order. We are Borg._  
  
The voice was cold, mechanical, and sterile. It was the terrible voice of the Borg Collective, and it echoed in my head.  
  
I looked over and saw my reflection somehow. Borg cybernetics covered the right half of my face, complete with the red sensor light.  
  
 _No pain. No feeling. Purpose and perfection._  
  
I turned my head the other way. Janias and Camilla faced me. They were likewise converted, completely in fact, every inch of their body being either grayed flesh or cyborg components. I tried to shift my thoughts under the weight in my mind, but I couldn't get out from under it. It was crushing me.  
  
And then other voices came through my mind.  
  
 _Help us._  
  
 _Please Doctor! Get us out of here!_  
  
There was a tear on Cami's remaining eye. Jan also looked like she was on the verge of crying out. When they verbally spoke, it was with the monotone of a drone. "We are Borg. We are perfection."  
  
 _Doctor, why?! Why didn't you stop them?!_  
  
I could hear Cami's voice accuse me in my thoughts, coming down through the weight of the Collective in my head.  
  
"I tried," I said, weakly. "I tried. Oh Cami, Jan.... I'm sorry..."  
  
 _How could you let them do this to us?!_  
  
"I'm sorry!", I shouted.  
  
The Collective and my Companions started to speak over each other and within each other.  
  
 _You will be one with the Borg, just as they are._  
  
 _Doctor, please! Make it stop! Make it..._  
  
The girls faltered, as if struck, and the Collective's voice came through again.  
  
 _Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated._  
  
"No!"  
  
They straightened up again. My companions looked at me with cold, lifeless eyes.  
  
"You will be Borg," Janias promised.  
  
"No...."  
  
"Resistance is futile," Cami agreed.  
  
 _The ones you call Janias and Camilla are gone. There is only Borg._  
  
" _No!_ "  
  
The scream echoed... and I opened my eyes again, my throat feeling dry and raw.  
  
After a moment, I realized what had happened. Seven had gotten me with the "off-button hypospray".  
  
Talk about embarrassing.  
  
I had half expected to be in the brig or sickbay, but I was in a comfortable bed in the middle of what passed for a guest hotel room, so clearly guest quarters. Beside me a tray had been set out with breakfast, the warm foods kept in insulated containers to keep out the cold.  
  
My stomach decided that it didn't care that the contents had come from Neelix's kitchen. If I didn't eat, it would go on strike.  
  
My brain dared it to and ignored the food. I got to my feet and saw one of my suits hanging in the wardrobe. I ignored it as well and went to the door. It was locked and, upon examination, I realized I didn't have my sonic screwdriver with me. Of course. I knocked at the door. "Anyone out there?! I'm not bloody well..."  
  
The door slid open, revealing Tuvok. "You are awake, Doctor."  
  
"And not bloody happy either, what was that..."  
  
Tuvok, with time-tried Vulcan patience, ignored me and hit his comm badge. "Tuvok to Sickbay. The Doctor is awake."  
  
" _Of course I'm... oh yes, him. I will be by shortly._ "  
  
I glared at the Vulcan. "What is going on? I don't have time for games, not when my Companions..."  
  
"You were in need of rest," Tuvok pointed out. "And you still require sustenance. Both are needed if you are going to free your Companions from the Borg."  
  
"So you had me sedated and locked into quarters?"  
  
"Captain Janeway and Seven agreed it was for the best. It would not be logical to allow you to engage the Borg in the state you were in. Your assimilation into the Collective would not be in our best interest or the Federation's."  
  
"Ah, I see." I crossed my arms. "And instead of asking nicely you just decided..."  
  
"You were in an extreme emotional state and behaving irrationality. We were left with little other choice." Tuvok motioned to the tray. "Might I suggest that while you wait, you partake of the meal provided? It will go far to convince the Doctor-" and here Tuvok evinced that mild sense of bemusement that passed for Vulcan humor "-that you are clear to, in a certain way, return to duty."  
  
I sighed and, with much irritation and impatience, returned to my bed and worked on the food. It was a breakfast mix of cereals warm and cold, eggs that were almost certainly replicated, and some fruit I wasn't familiar with. My stomach was appeased in the process.  
  
I had worked my way through most of the meal when Tuvok entered the quarters with, well, the Doctor beside him. The Mark I EMH to be precise, and I shall call him that to avoid confusion. "Doctor, allow me to introduce..." Ah, that Vulcan bemusement returned. "...the Doctor."  
  
"Charmed," the EMH said drolly.  
  
"We'll have to figure the name situation out, I imagine," I said.  
  
"Hardly." The EMH crossed his arms. "I have well over a thousand doctorates from the individuals whose expertise contributed to my program. How many do you have?"  
  
"Two," I answered, and truthfully. "Temporal Mechanics and Quantum Mechanics Doctorates, from the Unseen University in Ankh-Morpork. I'm the Visiting Lecturer in Quantum Wibbly and Chair of Temporal Irritation Studies. They gave me a pointy hat and everything."  
  
"Oh really." The EMH's tone belied skepticism. "Full doctorates?'  
  
"Technically honorary," I conceded. "Technically because I got them for sealing a six-dimensional Crack in space-time that was going to destroy their world."  
  
"How very interesting."  
  
I dropped the conversation there for what it was; an attempt to get my mind off Jan and Cami. It didn't work. "I need to be going now..."  
  
"Not before we finish my examination of your current physical state," the EMH informed me. He set his medkit on a nearby counter and opened up. "First things first." He brought out a wooden... oh really? That's just.... "Open wide and say 'aaaaah'."  
  
I endured the forced examination stoically. Okay, no I didn't, I complained the entire time on their being unnecessary. It was something to do to try and distract myself from my emotions.  
  
I could still see Janias and Camilla being taken, after I was so close to saving them. So close. But not enough. They had been freed from slavery in the Sith Empire, had experienced the wonders of the Multiverse with me, had saved my life how many times... and I'd failed them. I'd let them be taken by a force that would enslave them in more total fashion than any Sith Lord would bother. Their bodies would be mutilated, their minds crushed and tethered to a controlled hive mind, and they would be nothing more than minor pieces of a vast, all-consuming machine.  
  
And it was my fault. My fault for not finding a home for them and not giving them the life they deserved, a life where they could be together and happy.  
  
The lifetimers Death had shown me, and Queen Mab's warning, all dragged my hearts down into my stomach. I'd gone too far, taken too far. And it had cost them everything.  
  
After compiling the results of his tests on me and looking at his medical tricorder scans, the EMH remarked, "A very interesting physiology you have. You've only had ten hours of sleep but I'm showing...."  
  
" _Ten bloody hours?!_ "  
  
"....given you were awake at least thirty-four before your sedation, ten hours of sleep is light by most species' standards," the EMH pointed out. "But you appear to be more than sufficiently rested."  
  
"Five hours is plenty for me," I grumbled. "Usually." I tried to focus on him because when I didn't... I saw my Companions' horrified faces again.  
  
The door opened and Janeway entered with Seven. "How is he?"  
  
"Rested and fed," the EMH answered. "And irascible, irritable, and uncooperative."  
  
"You make me miss Chakwas."  
  
"Whomever Doctor Chakwas was, I'm certain she doesn't miss you."  
  
"We had a glass of Serrice Ice Brandy, actually," I countered. "She's a very erudite woman." I directed my attention to Janeway and Seven. "So, what is it you want?"  
  
"Did you think I'd let you run off to fight the Borg in the shape you were in?", Janeway pointed out. "It would be a disaster if the Borg assimilated you and your craft."  
  
"Well, I'm all rested and fed, so can I be on my way now?"  
  
"No," Janeway replied. "I won't let you go off like this. You're not thinking straight. Against the Borg, that doesn't work."  
  
"So you're going to hold me prisoner? Really?" I felt venom come into my voice. Who did she think she was, trying to...  
  
"Actually, I intend to help you," Janeway said, interrupting my thoughts.  
  
"Oh?" I raised an eyebrow, feeling skeptical. "Help me, eh? Going to risk your ship and crew for me? Or maybe you've got a colony of warrior cobalt tarantulas to help me out."  
  
Janeway gave me a look of bemusement mixed with irritation. Before she could speak her comm badge went off. I recognized the dull speech patterns of Chakotay speaking from the other end. " _Bridge to Janeway._ "  
  
"Go ahead."  
  
" _We've got the Borg cube on long range sensors. Torres thinks she can keep us at this speed for four more hours before we have to drop out of warp._ "  
  
"Keep me informed, Commander. Janeway out."  
  
I stared at her. "You can't overtake them."  
  
"No." Janeway folded her arms. "But I can have the ship close enough to help if you can get a team on board with your ship."  
  
"Ah." I put a hand to my chin, feeling the stubble forming from a lack of a shave for quite a while. "We have to expect the Borg learned of what I did to your ship from Jan and...."  
  
 _Doctor!_  
  
The voice echoed in my head suddenly and made me stop in mid-sentence.  
  
 _Doctor, I can't..._  
  
Images flashed into my head. The interior of a Borg ship from a regeneration cell. Terror and pain filled my head.  
  
"Janias," I whispered.  
  
 _Please Doctor! Help! I can't keep them out of my head! I can't...._  
  
 _Help us Doctor!_  
  
"Camilla!"  
  
I felt the power of the Collective Hive Mind come smashing down on the connection. I made a short cry and fell back onto the bed as the connection I'd felt slammed shut.  
  
The _Voyager_ crew looked at me with interest. "A telepathic link, Doctor?", Tuvok asked me.  
  
"Janias. She... it would be very complicated to explain how it works, but she has powers like this. We've linked telepathically quite often, and she is even closer to Cami." I rubbed at my forehead. "I felt their minds just now. I think... I think the Borg had them in a regeneration cycle, and Janias' mind was able to get free enough to try and reach me." I blinked and looked to Seven, who clearly felt something as well. "When you accosted me, Seven, did you feel something?"  
  
"Briefly," she admitted. "I could not determine what the source was."  
  
I felt my mind pick up. "Your old connection to the Collective. It's severed now, but you still have the.... of course!"  
  
"Doctor, what are you going on about?", asked Janeway.  
  
"That's what happened! That's why I dreamed about.... When Seven forced me to sleep and came into close contact with me, my Time Lord telepathy reached out to Janias somehow, and Seven's remaining implants provided... provided a sort of booster signal, or a translator to let my mind feel the Collective."  
  
Tuvok raised an eyebrow. "And this means?"  
  
"It means it's not too late," I said. "They haven't been entirely broken by the Collective hive mind yet. I'm not too late to save them! You said you wanted to help, right? Because I'm going to need it." I looked to Seven. "Especially yours. We need to talk."  
  
"What is your plan, Doctor?" Janeway's question made it clear she wanted an answer.  
  
"To prove your ship the means to get close and assist after we go aboard the Cube and cripple it," I answered. "Which is why Seven and I need to talk. In her cargo bay."  
  
Seven looked at me with interest. "Very well."  
  
"I'll be right down," i said. "I just need to run by Main Engineering first and make a few adjustments to the warp systems. It'll buy us time before the ship has to drop from warp." I grabbed the fresh suit. "And I need to go change, I suppose. I do feel a tad grimy."  
  
My hearts raced as I shooed them out of the room. I was still horrified by what the Borg had done.... but now I knew all wasn't lost. I could still save them!  
  
And if the Borg got in my way... they would know what it meant to provoke the fury of a Time Lord.  
  
  
  
  
When I arrived in Seven's cargo bay I looked around. It still had remaining Borg tech in it, including her own regeneration chamber. "No bed?", I asked quietly.  
  
"I do not need it for rest," she replied, looking back from a control console.  
  
"I don't know, I rather like my comfy hammock back on the TARDIS. Laying down has its advantages for rest." I finished stepping in and let the door close. "I suppose this is why you don't ask for quarters."  
  
"I do not need them." Seven stepped away from the console. "You wished to speak."  
  
"Yes." I stepped up to her. "You convinced Janeway to have me sedated. Why?"  
  
"Because you were in need of rest and were refusing it," she answered. "If you had gone after the Borg in that state, you would have failed. The consequences were unacceptable."  
  
"You didn't ask me first! You didn't even try to convince me!"  
  
"No, I did not. I knew it would not accomplish anything."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yes." Seven never flinched. "Because in your place, I believe I would have done the same."  
  
My posture slackened slightly. "What?"  
  
"I understand what it is to be more than Human. To have a stronger body and mind. It can make you feel stronger than you really are. It can make you forget the need for rest." Seven stepped away from me and back to her console. "You were focused solely on retrieving your Companions. In your state, I had no other alternative."  
  
"I see." I grit my teeth, unwilling to admit how right she was.  
  
"Is that all you wished to speak about?"  
  
"No." I stepped up to another station and peered at it. "You still have a supply of nanites, yes?"  
  
"My body produces nanites to aid in self-repair, yes," Seven answered.  
  
"Good. Because I need some."  
  
"For?"  
  
I took out my sonic, which had been left on the TARDIS. I ran it over a console and looked at the code inside. "Because I have a plan. I'll also need all samples of Borg control code you still have."  
  
Seven turned toward me again. "What is this plan you have, Doctor?"  
  
"We need to buy time for _Voyager_ to find Jan and Cami, not to mention time for them to catch up to the Cube. I think I'm going to perform a little sabotage first."  
  
"How? Borg cubes have multiple redundancies in each system, with defenses that will escalate as each system becomes more necessary to the function of the vessel. You could never take them all out," Seven pointed out.  
  
"Probably. But that's not the sabotage I have in mind." I pocketed my sonic. "I've got another plan. And, as I said, I'll need your help. I'll need you to help me implement it."  
  
"And that plan is, Doctor?"  
  
"Simple." I smiled wolfishly. And yes, I do mean a very wolfish smile. My mood was not sunny at all, so my smiles were rather vicious things. "We're going to give the Borg what they want."  
  
That earned me a stare.  
  
  
  
  
After much preparation work was completed, I stepped into the TARDIS and fired up the engine. The VWORP VWORP VWORP sounded like music to my ears, but it was bittersweet. I had grown so accustomed to Jan and Cami standing beside me as I did this that to know they were gone, that I might yet still lose them, robbed the moment of its joyous luster.  
  
When I stepped back out, I emerged in darkness halted only by sinister green light. I was on a catwalk looking out over a long gap, a gap lined by dozens, hundreds, of Borg drones in their control chambers. Beyond was the cubed shape of what I supposed to be this Cube's computer core. It was certainly the center from which the ship was operated.  
  
" ** _Your arrival has been detected. Prepare for assimilation._** "  
  
"I've come to offer you a bargain for the return of Janias and Camilla," I replied.  
  
" _ **Bargains are irrelevant. You will be assimilated.**_ "  
  
"I choose not to be."  
  
" _ **Choice is irrelevant. You must comply.**_ "  
  
"No, actually, I must _not_ ," I retorted. I could hear drones starting to approach me on the catwalk from either side. I locked the TARDIS doors so they couldn't open them if they got around me. "I've come in peace for the return of my Companions. You will return them and in exchange I'll leave the Borg Collective alone."  
  
" _ **We have adapted to your energy manipulation devices. You cannot harm us. You will become one with the Borg. You must comply.**_ "  
  
Ordinarily, I might have made a snarky comment about the Collective's lack of imaginative dialogue. But not here. Not with the anger and rage and hate growing in my hearts and in my head, red and hot and ready to be unleashed. I clamped it down though. That was a spring of power I was saving up for something else. "Last chance. Remove Janias and Camilla from your Collective and return them to me."  
  
" _ **Your biological and technological distinctiveness will be added to our own. Resistance is futile.**_ "  
  
Well, that was that then.  
  
It was time for the Borg to learn why entire civilizations fear the name of the Doctor.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our narrator confronts the Borg Queen to save Jan and Cami.

The Borg aren't very good at creativity. They're good at adapting, yes. But the problem with adapting is that you've got to take the hits first, while a creative mind might guess what hits were coming before they landed and plan for them.  
  
This failure on their part was what I was counting on.  
  
The drones lurched on. I brought up my sonic and triggered it, facing to my right. When nothing happened, undoubtedly from their adaptions, I changed the setting and triggered a different pulse. The drone collapsed in a shower of sparks. I used the same setting against the drone closest on my left and took it down too. The one behind that was not harmed. I switched to the sonic disruptor and triggered a Setting 4 blast to my right that send three drones flying from the catwalk. I fell back toward the TARDIS, moving the sonic disruptor over and triggering the pulse again. It slammed against the lead unit's adapted force shield and did nothing.  
  
" _ **Resistance is futile. Lower your weapons. You will be assimilated.**_ "  
  
I reached back to take the TARDIS door.  
  
A field of green light flashed into existence over the handle.  
  
Internal forcefield. Of course.  
  
So I pulled out the TARDIS remote and concentrated, calling it to me so that it would phase through the shield and...  
  
....and nothing.  
  
_**"Your technology has been adapted to. Resistance is futile. You will be Borg.**_ "  
  
Well, bugger all of that.  
  
I made a fight of it, of course, swinging my sonics around, shifting settings and frequencies and everything. More drones fell so that the rest could adapt.  
  
And then, before you knew it, they were on top of me, and there was nowhere left to run. I was grabbed by the arms.  
  
At that point, the walk shuddered underneath me. A small pinprick of red light appeared in the distance. There was a definite vibration across every surface.  
  
I smirked. "Oh, look at that. Seems while you were so focused on me, some of my friends from _Voyager_ moved around and took out the generators powering your warp systems. I sort of slipped them in, you see, before coming to see you. And now you've had to drop out of warp. And when _Voyager_ gets here, she'll have more than enough firepower to destroy you. So, still so obstinate about giving up two people?"  
  
" _ **Once your mind is part of the Collective, we will know all modifications you have made to the vessel**_ **Voyager _. It will be assimilated._** "  
  
And, without ceremony, two drones dug their tubules into my neck and released assimilation nanites.  
  
Heh. All was going according to plan.  
  
They were quick buggers too. They moved rapidly through my bloodstream, no doubt gathering whatever materials they needed from my body to begin forming into the basic implants that caused assimilation. I gasped and dropped to my knees. Within seconds the first implants were already forming on my brain. _You are now Borg. You are now one with the Collective._ The voice began drowning out my thoughts, pulling at them instead and attempting to implant directives.  
  
I resisted. I called upon the full capability of my Time Lord brain and shouted back at the Collective. _Alright, now you're inside my head, but you can't take it over. I'm not like anything you've encountered before!_  
  
_You will be one with the Borg. Resistance is futile._  
  
_Oi, can't you lot come up with..._  
  
Pain stabbed through my head, a migraine that grew in pressure as the cacophony of the Borg Collective tried to drown my thoughts, my very sense of self.  
  
And it was here that I let it go. All of the anger and hate and guilt and pain over what they'd done to Jan and Cami, over what they represented, sprang up from within me, providing a wellspring of emotional power that I used to push back against the Collective. I called upon everything I had, everything I was, and challenged the Borg Collective with it. Not simply holding them back, but pushing into them. Not a drone, but an independent mind pressing through the connection, re-directing the power of the connection to my own desires.  
  
And in the echos, amongst the many voices of the Collective, I heard what I'd come for.  
  
_Doctor?! Doctor, is that you?!_  
  
_Doctor...!_  
  
_I'm here. I've come for you._  
  
I felt like my head would split open at this point, but I wouldn't let up. I had to give some ground in my own mind, but it allowed me to burrow into the command systems of the Borg cube. I bypassed the most critical systems and found what I was looking for; the transporters.  
  
_Jan! Cami!_ I called out to them through the link, needing only a moment to ensure...  
  
_Doctor, I can't... the voice is too loud, it's..._  
  
That was Jan. I felt her location on the Cube, a vibrant light amongst the thousands of drones attached to it, aided by the unique aura she held, by her power in the Force fueling her refusal to submit to the Collective no matter how painful it was. Sooner or later they would prevail, but I had found her first. I activated the transporter, beaming her to my location.  
  
That left Cami.  
  
The pressure on my head was getting louder and heavier. The Collective was fighting back, demanding I accept it, demanding I become part of its whole. I roared back defiance. _I am not like anything you have met before. I am a Time Lord! I have brought down a galaxy of creatures even more terrible than you, I have faced down cosmic forces beyond your ken and held my ground! You are not going to take_ me _and you are going to return to me my Companions!_  
  
I had to give up a bit more of my head. I let the Borg pick at the part of my mind I felt locked away, the part representing my old Human memories, using it as a sort of flank barrier to protect other memories, more crucial memories, things about the future I couldn't let them know. I felt the Borg try to get through and around it as I plunged ever deeper into the cube's portion of the vast Collective, all in search of one mind, one light among many, just a bit brighter than the rest.  
  
_I can't think, I can't... I am Borg. I am..._  
  
I found her. Cami's mind was weakening. Without the gift of the Force or the power of a Time Lord brain she had only her brilliance, her will to be her own woman, and her love for Janias to hold on to the last shreds of self. The Collective had her on the edge, about to fall, about to be consumed...  
  
_Cami! I'm here!_  
  
_Doctor!_ I felt a glimmer of hope come from her mind, lighting her up amongst the mass of hopeless drones. _Doctor, please, I can't..._  
  
I felt her location and triggered the transporter again, bringing her to me. They stood behind me on the catwalk now, motionless, the Collective having no commands for them at the moment.  
  
And then, just to be sure, I used my last gasp to turn the transporters against themselves, beaming out sections of their own machinery, intentionally drawing extra power, anything to sabotage them. With that done I relinquished control, retreating my mind back to shore it up against the Borg efforts to overwhelm me.  
  
_Your cube is crippled._ Voyager _will destroy it. Will you continue this fight for just two drones when I've already done so much damage?_ I smirked. _Return my friends and I'll leave you._  
  
The pressure on my head picked up in reply.  
  
And then, I was somewhere else.  
  
Or rather, the Collective had entered my mind enough that it was able to draw in my perceptions. I stood amongst bright, shining, green stars, a sea of them, small and large. And I instinctively knew that they were the entirety of the Borg Collective. Cubes, Unimatrix facilities, assimilated planets, everything.  
  
A lone figure formed beside me.  
  
"Hello Doctor." She smiled knowingly, in the form of a woman save for the clear Borg parts of her main body.  
  
"The Queen of the Hive," I answered.  
  
"My, you have a powerful mind. To resist the Collective this long?"  
  
"Comes with being a Time Lord." I crossed my arms. "Is the Collective so desperate it needs two more drones?"  
  
"Are you so desperate you would risk everything for just two people?", the Queen countered. "We have entered your mind, Doctor, and know that they are just two of oh so many traveling companions. With your ability to travel, why are they so important? Why do you not go for the others? So many names I see in your thoughts. Molly, Korra, Katherine, Madoka..."  
  
"Jan and Cami suffered enough as slaves to the Sith," I declared. "I won't leave them to your slavery."  
  
"In the Collective, they know perfection," the Queen purred. "They know the feel of the cosmic winds upon our vessels and enjoy the timeless knowledge of our mind."  
  
"Is that any substitute for never being able to hold hands and look into each other's eyes? Or the heart-felt love shared in a laugh or a kiss? They would never have a free thought again, never know love and friendship and happiness. They would be mere drones, small cogs in your machine."  
  
"You actually see such small things as important?" The Queen sighed audibly. "Why is it that all of you refuse to acknowledge the greatness the Collective offers? Why do you insist on clinging to small and meaningless parts of too-short lives when we offer you eternity and peace and knowledge? You, a being who can witness the death of galaxies and the birth of entire universes, why would you care about whether two small, insignificant beings are able to indulge in petty and small acts that provide only a moment's gratification? Why would you think that better than the gift of the Collective's perfection?"  
  
I shook my head and laughed at her. "You really don't understand, do you. You never have. You're not perfect and you never were. You're a sterile creature, at your core the product of unchanging and unthinking programming that breaks everything down to mathematical precision. Whom to assimilate, whom to leave alone, what system to devour and which to ignore. What deals to honor or to break, all by your rigid calculus of benefit and cost. You talk about having knowledge and experience but your machine 'perfection' blinds you to what they actually mean. You call them small? _You_ are small. An insignificant mind with a vast body that can't enjoy the beauty of what the galaxy has to offer."  
  
"We are the Borg. We are Perfection," the Queen insisted. "We combine the best of all species into one stronger whole."  
  
"And all without the soul to actually _live_ ," I retorted.  
  
The Queen sneered. "I had hoped to see you enter the Collective willingly. With your powerful mind intact the Collective would have the means to bring its perfection to other galaxies. But if you will not accept the gift offered, it is of no consequence. We have you, Doctor. We have you entirely. You are now Borg. You cannot resist the voice of the Collective. Your struggling is irrelevant."  
  
The pain in my head growing. The cacophony of the Borg Collective threatened to drown out my thoughts. Jan and Cami, even though they now stood beside me, might as well have been across the ship. The Queen was bringing the entirety of the Collective to bear on me, and even my Time Lord mind couldn't shut them out forever. I was losing this battle.  
  
I smiled regardless.  
  
And then the Queen frowned.  
  
  
  
"Oh, you silly little buggers," I laughed. "Can't help yourselves. Got to consume. Got to assimilate everything, right?"  
  
The Queen stumbled backward. Below me, a single green light went out.  
  
"You remember Seven, right? Of course you do. She's still got nanoprobes, you know. Oh, they don't assimilate anymore, but they do a lot of other tasks. And they're not too hard to reprogram." I stood up in the mindspace between us, although I remained on my knees back in the Cube. "And she still had so many fragments of the Borg command code that it wasn't hard to make a few with that. Plus some... improvements."  
  
"What have you done?", the Queen rasped while other green lights started to wink out.  
  
My smile grew and I'd like to think I was pulling off a good air of Ten as I continued. "You really should be more careful with what you download, because you just fell for the oldest trick in the book. I'm afraid the Collective has picked up something we like to call a Trojan."  
  
A big green light went out.  
  
"Oh, that was an entire homeworld, wasn't it? That's got to hurt." I smirked. "You were in such a hurry to assimilate me that you just gobbled up the nanoprobes in my body like they weren't there. Which, I suppose, they weren't. They were, after all, Borg nanoprobes, with Borg coding. No threat at all. So you swallowed them up, code and all. And now that code's changing you at the very core. That's what all this was about, you know. It's why I let you assimilate me. I knew you couldn't resist. Now the Collective's being disconnected, drone by drone, node by node."  
  
As the green lights continued to wink out, creating splotches of dark, the Queen stumbled backward. "We will not be stopped," she insisted. "We are Borg! We adapt! We assimilate! We...."  
  
"Oh, yes, you'll adapt. You're doing it even now. But so will my code. My Trojan's a smart bugger, you see. After all, he's mine, and I'm a Time Lord, and our race was old when our universe was still young and long before you lot ever came to be. So, well..." I laughed. "....he's going to make you work for it. Oh, he's so going to make you work for it."  
  
The Queen watched the lights go out. The Collective howled in outrage and confusion in my head. The pressure began to slacken as it withdrew from my mind and started to disconnect itself.  
  
But I wouldn't let it. Not yet. I pressed my mind into the Collective to keep the connection to this Cube open to it. With my Trojan having prepared the way, I reasserted some control of the Cube and used it to lower the shields and disable main power, ensuring the Borg couldn't just blow the entire Cube up, while I held control of the communications arrays that provided the constant subspace link that bound together the Borg Collective.  
  
Through the Cube's sensors, I saw as _Voyager_ came out of warp, phasers firing. Ribbons of amber sliced into the Cube's hull, striking weak points that I was providing to Tuvok to keep the Borg off-balance and prevent them from destroying _Voyager_.  
  
And last but definitely not least, I lowered the forcefield around the TARDIS.  
  
"A quantum isolation field. Very clever. I bet you picked that up from the girls' memories of how the DTI once trapped the TARDIS," I said. "Of course, it wouldn't have worked if I'd been trying. I figured out how to break those a while ago. For a special project I've got in mind. But I give you points for effort."  
  
Fully a quarter of the green lights had gone out. The Queen looked up from the projections and hissed defiance. "I can still take them," she said. "The connection to the vessel you are on will let me trigger their auto-destruct implants."  
  
"You can try," I countered. "And if you do, I'll hold this connection open and maintain the Trojan until the entire bloody Collective is torn apart, stripped down to its component pieces. You will cease to exist. Some races will reassert their minds through the local nodes and other sections, well, they'll create hundreds, thousands, of Queens. The Collective will fight itself to exhaustion. Besides..." I shrugged. "I already handled that."  
  
By this point, the TARDIS door had opened. Seven and the EMH stepped out, hyposprays in hand. Before the Collective mind could move Jan or Cami, the hyposprays had sent more nanoprobes into their bodies, probes designed to take over and cut the connection to the Collective in their implants. As their bodies went limp and collapsed, Seven took them and pulled them back into the TARDIS.  
  
The Queen felt that, just as she felt every other disconnection brought by my work. She was, after all, simply the incarnation of the Collective's hive mind. She stared at me in horror as yet more green lights winked out below us. I felt her desperate attempts to retake control of the Cube I was on, to order it to destroy itself, but I blocked them.  
  
"Well, that does that," I said. "Seven is about to cut my connection to the Collective as well. But before I go, I have something to say." I drew up to her until our eyes were locked together. I looked into her dark, cold, inhuman eyes and frowned. "This is what happens when you cross me, Queen Bee. I get angry. And when Time Lords get angry, oh, we get _nasty_. So consider this a warning. The races of the Alpha and Beta Quadrants are under my protection. The crew of the _Voyager_ is under my protection. And my Companions, well, that's what got you into this mess, isn't it? That's what's earned you this spanking. Bottom line...." I narrowed my eyes. "If you ever, _ever_ come after one of those things again, I will become _very angry_ , and the next time I deal with you, _it will be more than a spanking_."  
  
And then, to dig it in a bit more, I just had to add one last line.  
  
"Remember little Queen. _Resistance is futile._ "  
  
And with that, I stopped trying to hold the connection. The Collective, desperate to cut off the source of the Trojan, cut the line to the Cube. My awareness focused entirely on my surroundings.  
  
Seven offered a hand and brought me to my feet. "The connection implants in your friends' bodies have already deactivated," she informed me. "They will be safe."  
  
The Cube shook ahead. Main power began to surge online as the Cube's base programming, even infected by the Trojan like it was, started to come back online. Even my alterations couldn't outright eliminate the command program. I only had a few hours to make the bloody thing, after all.  
  
Which meant that it would become a local branch of the Collective and would, well, want to eat us anyway.  
  
I easily retrieved my sonics from where I'd dropped them. We got back into the TARDIS and I shifted us back to _Voyager_. I looked up and noticed the beginnings of a Borg implant on my face. "Oh dear, that's going to leave a mark," I murmured.  
  
"Fortunately for you, I am an _actual_ doctor," the EMH pointed out smugly.  
  
I ignored him for the moment. When we stepped back out of the TARDIS I was back to where we arrived when this mess began; the bridge of _Voyager_. The Borg Cube loomed on the screen, multiple fires streaming from its hull. "The Borg vessel's shields are still offline," Tuvok reported. "But I am detecting weapons locks."  
  
The Borg lashed out, slicing into _Voyager_ 's shields. My modifications allowed them to hold for the moment, but there was only so much power _Voyager_ could bring to bear. "Remember those torpedoes I modified, Captain?", I asked.  
  
"Yes. Mister Kim, have Chakotay and Paris beamed back aboard with their teams?"  
  
"Yes ma'am."  
  
Janeway held onto her chair as the _Voyager_ shook again. "Then we're done here. Mister Tuvok, lock photon torpedoes and fire!"  
  
On the screen, two photon torpedoes became visible, their red drive fields creating sparkling effects as they flew at the Borg ship.  
  
When they made impact, the entire bridge lit up with a white light so intense that it overpowered the monitor safety systems nad forced everyone to shield their eyes.  
  
When the light faded, the Cube was, well, no longer a Cube. It was about a third of a Cube... and a fourth of a Cube... and then a bit of a corner piece.  
  
"What was that?", Torres asked. "The blast yield was..."  
  
"Oh, it was massive. That's what happens when you mix anti-matter explosives with a little substance known as naquadriah." I shrugged. "Had to use all of it I'd scraped together to arm those torpedoes."  
  
"You're a man of many surprises, Doctor," Janeway said to me, a slight grin on her face. "I think I liked you better before the Borg implant, though."  
  
I reached a hand up and touched the cold gray surface that now stuck out of my right temple. "Yes. I'm not thrilled by it. Your Doctor's assistance will be most appreciated. We'll shift the TARDIS right down."  
  
"Oh no you won't," the EMH insisted. "As soon as we get your friends into sickbay, you'll put that thing in a cargo bay and then come for your surgery."  
  
I rolled my eyes, grinning despite myself.  
  
Despite everything, I was grinning. I felt happy, ecstatic even.  
  
Not because I'd given the Borg a black eye and bloody nose. No, that fed my ego, but that wasn't the source of my joy.  
  
I'd saved them. I'd saved Jan and Cami. Everything could go back to the way it was before this wretched, unplanned excursion.  
  
How naive I was.  
  
  
  
  
Some hours later, I sat up in sickbay with my face restored. The EMH had acted remarkably fast in removing the few implants the Borg nanites had placed in my body, aided by Seven in the process.  
  
And then I looked at Jan and Cami. And I sighed.  
  
Their skin was still discolored, and would be until the last of the Borg implants and nanites were removed. BUt for the moment their skin was ashen gray and their bodies still marked by implants. The EMH told me it would take him days of surgeries to remove them all. I offered to help, of course.  
  
"Yes, and just where did you receive your doctorate again? Or your surgical training, hrm?" The EMH smirked. "Does that little blue box of yours give out the knowledge to perform complex surgical procedures? If not, I suggest you leave this to the professional."  
  
I made a harumph sound in reply.  
  
I spent a few hours in Engineering, helping to fix some damage and to fine-tune the engines so that _Voyager_ could get a little better mileage, so to speak, out of them. Then I went to the TARDIS and began work on a small gift for Seven, my way of saying thanks to her in particular. And then, rather tired, I took a two hour nap on my hammock on the TARDIS, feeling very pleased with myself.  
  
When I got back to sickbay, my Companions were finally awake, seated together on one of the beds along the side. They were wearing the teal patient gowns that Starfleet kept, which at least didn't leave you with your arse hanging out, and holding on to one another for dear life. I forced myself to draw breath at seeing that they were still not whole physically. Janias was better off; the Borg had apparently decided that as a unique species they didn't want to alter her body right away, so aside from her shaved head of hair she was not missing any body parts.  
  
Cami, however.... it was my worst fear. They'd removed her right eye and her left arm was missing at the elbow. Like Jan her hair had been cutoff completely and her scalp still had markings from the brain surgeries the EMH had been required to perform to get out the worst of the implants.  
  
My poor Companions. I'd failed them. I'd failed them and caused them such suffering.  
  
They held onto one another like each saw the other as a life preserver. Their eyes, or eye in Cami's case, opened and focused on me. I looked into them and...  
  
....and....  
  
....my hearts _broke_.  
  
I'd saved them, yes. I'd won the battle. For their sakes I had locked minds with the entirety of the Borg Collective. I had stared down the Borg Queen like she was an errant child.  
  
And yet I had still lost them.  
  
Their eyes, their expressions.... there was no joy there. I saw sadness and fear and terror. They were hanging on to each other for dear life like nothing else mattered.  
  
And, I suppose, nothing else did matter.  
  
Never again could those eyes look at the Multiverse and see wonders. They'd seen so many monsters with me, and we'd fought them off, but this time.... this time the monsters had gotten to them.  
  
This time a monster had gobbled them up, and it was only by great effort and risk that I had forced the monster to puke them back out.  
  
They'd feel indebted to me, of course. If I asked them to keep traveling they would. But there would be no joy in it like before, no wonder, no fun. They would go to each world looking over their shoulders out of terror, wondering what monster it would be this time, wondering if they would get taken again, and by something I couldn't save them from.  
  
And I couldn't do that to them. I wouldn't.  
  
I had to let them go.  
  
I had to let them go and be _alone_.  
  
With my hearts broken I slowly turned away, tears forming in my eyes. I felt a hand take my arm and looked over to see the EMH. He wasn't his usual self-important or snide self at this time. His expression radiated compassion and understanding as he led me into his office and helped me into a seat.  
  
And at that point, I couldn't hold it back anymore.  
  
I began to weep.  
  
And then I began to outright sob.  
  
_I'd lost my Companions._


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nothing will be the same again for our narrator as he makes preparations to say goodbye to Jan and Cami.

Over the following days I spent time going through the motions. Finishing repairs on the TARDIS and _Voyager_ , mostly. And the gift. And... other projects, as I started to come and go from the ship as needed to check on arrangements I had been quietly making for some time. Arrangements for Janias and Camilla.  
  
On one of those return trips I was about to bring back a cloned arm and eye for Cami, courtesy of Layom Station, and the EMH put them aside for surgical attachment. During those visits to Sickbay the girls were asleep, recovering from the repeated operations and what had been done to them. Every time I looked at them I felt the guilt rise within me. This had all started because I had taken them into danger for that quantum compiler device. If I hadn't...  
  
Well, if I hadn't, _Voyager_ might have been destroyed or assimilated, I grant. But it was still a haunting thought for me.  
  
Upon another return to _Voyager_ I found Seven waiting for me in her cargo bay. "Your friends came out of their last surgeries," she informed me.  
  
"Good. Are they awake?"  
  
"The Doctor thought it best to let them rest."  
  
"Of course." I reached into my pocket to feel a box. "That's good."  
  
"Doctor." Seven stepped up closer. "You defeated the Collective. But since returning your emotional state has been a negative one. Have you suffered damage that was not detected?"  
  
"No." I sighed. "No, I'm afraid my emotions have been from realizing what this has all meant for us. For Jan and Cami, this was all some big adventure, a chance to cut loose after years of being slaves in the Sith Empire. But now... it's different. Now I've led them to a place where they were taken, almost permanently, by a force far more total than any Sith slaver." I felt my voice falter a little. "They'll say yes if I ask. But their hearts won't be in it. They'll be doing it out of obligation, and they'll be scared every time I run into something terrible. I... I can't do that to them."  
  
"So you have made arrangements for them elsewhere?"  
  
"Yes. Very good ones, I must say. They'll be completely happy." I said that while trying to hold back the pain in my voice. I would be happy for them too... but not for myself. Not with myself. And as much as I had been trying to prepare myself for that, I still had the temptation to ask the girls to stay with me, no matter how selfish and uncaring it was.  
  
"I am sorry." Hearing those words made me look back at Seven. "I am sorry your friends suffered under the Collective."  
  
"Thank you," I answered. "Oh, and... before I forget..." I brought out the box in my pocket. "A small gift for you, Seven."  
  
Seven looked at the box for a moment before taking it. Upon opening it she saw what I'd put in; an interface device I'd rigged together. When she looked up at me to ask, I beat her to the question. "It's a device that will regulate the operation of your personal nanoprobes. You can adjust them to allow yourself to feel more Human, or crank them up to block out the Human bits when you need to. Not too far, though. Wouldn't want that to happen."  
  
"I..." She held the device in her hands carefully. It was a sliver of metal with one surface set to fix itself to the implant still on her right temple.  
  
"It's to let you regain something of the Humanity that got torn from you without compromising who you are now," I explained further. "You and I have that in common, after all. If I can't regain my Humanity, well, no reason to not help you regain your's."  
  
"What will you do?", Seven asked. "After your Companions have their new home?"  
  
"I'm... not sure. Continue traveling I suppose." I felt a tear in my eye as I thought about that. Traveling _alone_ of all things... no one to have my back, to share those experiences, those sights. "The truth of what happened to me is still out there. I'll find it, one day."  
  
"I wish you luck in that endeavor." Seven held the probe modifier like it was delicate. "And... thank you for the gift."  
  
"You're welcome."  
  
  
  
  
We weren't on _Voyager_ for very long after that. When Jan and Cami were ready we gathered at the TARDIS to leave.  
  
The crew of _Voyager_ turned out to see us off. I exchanged handshakes with them as they passed. "Whatever you did to the engines, Doctor, I've never seen efficiency ratings that high," Torres informed me.  
  
"Just some engineering tricks. It should help you stay on your way," I answered.  
  
Soon enough I was facing, well, the Morale Officer himself. "A word of advice, Neelix," I said as I accepted his hand. "I apologize for being so cross with you, and your stew was surprisingly appetizing, but you would be better served in remembering that sometimes... people don't want to talk. So don't press them on it, eh?"  
  
"Thank you, Doctor. that is very good advice." He had that insufferable wide grin on his face. "That reminds me of an old Talaxian..."  
  
"Don't push it, hedgehog," I warned, half-jokingly.  
  
The EMH stepped up. "Well, Doctor, it's good to see you on your way," he said.  
  
"Yes, I imagine that if I stayed around the confusion would be grating."  
  
"And finding you a new name would be difficult." With his self-assured smile, he stepped away. I smiled at that.  
  
Seven stepped up, her posture not as stiff as usual. My gift was now set onto her implant. "I see you've been tinkering with setting," I said warmly.  
  
"Yes." And, like that, a warm smile crossed her face. "Thank you, Doctor."  
  
"Thank you, Seven. You made rescuing Jan and Cami possible."  
  
She nodded at that. "Take care of yourself. Even Time Lords have their limits."  
  
"It is hard to forget some times," I conceded. "And you are right. The same goes for you. I may come back to check up once and a while."  
  
"I'll enjoy that."  
  
Eventually, I was facing Janeway. "Doctor, thank you for helping my ship and my crew," she said as I took her hand for the handshake. "It appears that the reports Starfleet has on you are wrong."  
  
"Well, mistakes happen, and miscommunication," I said graciously. "We'll have to get that sorted out one day."  
  
"I intend to advise Starfleet Command to reconsider Standing Order 30 as soon as we re-establish communications."  
  
"Good luck with that. DTI has something of a bug up their arse about me."  
  
"Don't you know, Doctor?" Janeway smirked. "They're that way about _everything_."  
  
And at that, I had to laugh.  
  
  
  
  
I placed the TARDIS in the Time Vortex and waited. Jan and Cami were seated on the stairs, holding on to one another and looking at each other, in the kind of silent conversation couples can easily have without words... nor simply through Force-powered telepathy. I had an inkling what they were working up to so I forced myself to stay busy on some system checks.  
  
"Doctor?"  
  
I turned at the sound of Cami's voice. They were looking at me. "Yes?"  
  
"Doctor, I know we've never..." She drew in a breath and looked back to Janias, who pulled her closer to show support. "Doctor, we.... want to know if you have any plans for where we might... might build a home."  
  
And there it was. The knives twisted inside my hearts, though I did my best not to show it. This was it then. They wanted to leave.  
  
I felt weight build in my knees. I felt the overpowering urge to drop and beg them to consider the TARDIS as home. I didn't want to to be parted, I didn't want to be alone.  
  
But I didn't. Because I knew they'd say 'yes.' I knew they'd sacrifice their happiness for mine.  
  
With my hand gripping a control on the TARDIS I drew in a breath. "You might say I did more than plan."  
  
  
  
  
The home galaxy of Janias and Camilla was vast, with many thousands of systems settled. Some where well-known. Some... were not so well-known.  
  
Salnorra was one such world.  
  
It was beautiful. It had a moderate population for a Core World, and in the heart of the Republic it was peaceful in most eras. For this instance, I picked a time about nine hundred years after the time they'd come from. I filled them in on the era as we stepped out of the TARDIS. "The Sith Empire's gone, all broken up and brought into the Republic. Peace reigns. The Jedi are friendly and not very dogmatic at this point. Altogether, it's going to be a lovely seven hundred or so years until the Sith come back out of the muck like always."  
  
The girls looked around. We were in a river valley, right along a sparkling blue river. Purple and blue-leaved flora were everywhere. Ahead of us, a magnificent two story house stood on the small hill overlooking the river.  
  
"What is this place?", Janias asked.  
  
"This? A private home, worth a couple million Republic credits." I turned and handed Cami a time period-specific holo device depicting legal documentation. "Specifically, a home purchased in your names."  
  
Jan and Cami looked at each other in shock. "But, we never had..."  
  
"Nine hundred years of interest in a secure bank does wonders for a bank account," I remarked. "Especially when the initial deposits are drawn from Sith and Imperial accounts in Hutt banks. You wouldn't believe the amount of money they packed away. Well, maybe you would...."  
  
"So that's our house," Cami asked.  
  
"Yes. And your speeders. And your entertainment units. And the bank accounts of course."  
  
"This is too much," Janias insisted. "I expected a home but this, _this_? Oh Doctor..."  
  
"You earned it," I told them. "You earned this from me. Don't worry about it." Despite everything I smiled at them and set my hands on their shoulders. "You've been so good to me, I couldn't give you anything less. You'll never know deprivation again here, and, well... if you ever want to raise a family, I can think of fewer nice places for them."  
  
There were tears in their eyes as they looked at each other. Janias sniffled. "It is something to think about," she said.  
  
There were no more words to be said. They threw their arms around me, and we had a heartfelt embrace. "Doctor..." Cami's voice was breaking. "What about you? What will yoiu do...?"  
  
"Oh, I'll get along."  
  
"Are you sure. We can... I mean, we don't have to..."  
  
"It's okay," I assured her. "You've earned this. You'll be happy here, and that's all I want."  
  
Rule Number One. The Doctor Lies.  
  
That's because, sometimes, it's a necessary lie.  
  
  
  
  
It took a day or so to unload their things from the TARDIS. Photos and holos of some of our friends went along. One holo depicted everyone who'd gone along on the mission to save some of the Air Nomads, another showed the snow war in the Carpenter backyard... there were pictures of us touring Ankh-Morpork with Captain Carrot, of stops at Layom Station, or the girls goofing off with Korra and Asami in sight of the Aang statue in Republic City. They were fond memories and, with my Time Lord brain, I would never forget them. Better for Jan and Cami to have them; that way, well....  
  
When everything had been taken out, Jan went to work getting their rooms set up while I approached Cami in the pantry with a case in my hand. "One last thing, Cami. This needs to go in your freezer unit." I handed it to her.  
  
She looked over the case and recognized the specialized caduceus insignia of Layom Station. "What is... Doctor, this is..." Her eyes had found the text on the case and widened.  
  
"I didn't want to presume too much, but I figured..." I took in a breath. "When you and Jan are ready, if you ever want to do this... well, the instructions are inside."  
  
We had all teared up enough that day, but more appeared in Cami's eyes. "This is too much, Doctor. Why..."  
  
"Because I owe it to you," I insisted. "Because I wasn't fast enough."  
  
"Doctor, you can't blame yourself. You warned us when we first agreed to go with you that it would be dangerous."  
  
"Not about something like the Borg," I countered. "And if it hadn't been the Borg, it would have been something else eventually. This..." I drew in a breath, forcing myself to confront the truth. "...this is another part of being the Doctor. The Doctor has Companions and, eventually... he has to let those Companions go. We've had a grand adventure, but I won't make you devote your lives to it." I patted the case. "I'll come back to see you, of course. See if there are any little ones. You know how I love being the crazy uncle."  
  
Cami giggled through her tears. "Puppet shows?"  
  
"Definitely puppet shows, yes. I'll even get to use my new puppet of Harry."  
  
"'Set them all on fire!'"," Cami laughed, although it started to sound a bit like sobbing.  
  
"Oh yes." I laughed too.  
  
I had to laugh. I couldn't let them see what I felt inside.  
  
  
  
  
I won't bore you with the repetitions that came with our goodbyes. Everything said there had already been said. I could see in their eyes the conflict that had set in; they wanted to settle down, but they were afraid for me. So I gave them assurances and we all teared up and hugged and said our goodbyes.  
  
Once back on the TARDIS I went to work on the controls and shifted myself away, feeling warm and happy for the moment. Jan and Cami had suffered so much in their young lives that they deserved the happiness they would find in that house. It would be a home for them and the family that, in time, I knew would come to them. And I would stop in every once and a while. Of course I would.  
  
I made a stop to refuel the TARDIS, and as it spun slowly in space, recharging itself from the energies of a nearby temporal rift.... that's when it got to me. The silence. Not the warm silence that came whenever they had retired to their room on the TARDIS, but something deeper. A still, hollow silence that seemed to drown out any other possible sound.  
  
And that was when the full force of it hit me, a fear that had been building up since I'd looked into their eyes in the _Voyager_ sickbay and knew they were ready to leave.  
  
For the first time since I'd been taken from a life I scarcely remembered losing, _I was alone_.  
  
 _ **I was alone.**_  
  
  



End file.
